I don't suppose it's easy to imagine, but if you can grasp the idea of Kermit the Frog seducing a young woman with an "aggressive valley girl voice", who also may have some serious daddy issues, then you're halfway there.
Then imagine that woman talking about 'her inner goddess' dancing the dance of seven veils, something about itty bitty elephants, and borrowing a toothbrush like the dirty girl she is. Aaaaand then Kermit somehow has to play off that, and there's mention of a chocolate starfish.
Okay that was kind of painful to write... I'm sorry to anyone who enjoys 50 Shades of Grey, too! I don't mean to bash it in general because I haven't read it. Just the ridiculousness with which it was relayed to me last night left my abs incredibly sore from laughter. Honestly, it was one of the best things ever. I hope each and every one of you is lucky enough to someday hear Kermit's voice pleading you to "Put the chicken in the fridge."