Adventure #60: Spring and Spiky Things

This week has been crazy! I'm on Spring Break at the moment, and have done something new or seen something beautiful every single day for the past several days. 

Yesterday, I walked around downtown Boise for a couple of hours in the rain. I visited Dutch Bros, Rediscovered Books, The Flying M, and any other store that seemed interesting. I went to Pie Hole for dinner, and then walked in the rain some more while I ate pizza. 

I started a new series on Netflix called "Tales by Light", too! I would highly recommend it. The show follows photographers through a few of their projects, and shows the act of photography from the photographers' perspective. I think it's beautifully done, and terribly fascinating.

On Saturday, I spontaneously decided that I had waited long enough, and it was time to cut my hair. I hadn't realized how tired I'd become of my hair being obectified, needing to be brushed twice a day, and feeling so heavy. Those cells had been with me for a very long time, and I had no idea how liberating it would feel to let them go. It's also been freeing to not be able to hide my face anymore, and to not be able to remember what I look like now. I've never had my hair this short before, and I love it! Before and after pictures! 

             

Other of my adventures included walks through the cemetery near our house, walks down by the river, and walks downtown. It feels amazing to be able to go anywhere whenever I feel like it! I don't worry anymore about who I'll run into, or whether or not someone else would enjoy going with me somewhere. I just walk. 

I went shopping for the first time in a long time! Over the last few holidays, I'd been given several gift cards that I decided to use to start making my room feel more livable. At the moment, I have a borrowed bedside lamp that lights up my whole room, and all of my clothes, books, and possessions are in boxes. Still! It's my own room, and I love it. And now I have some lights on the way!

Also I sat down in the grass on campus, and made this thing out of the spiky seeds that drop all over the place. That was a good day. 

On Thursday, I hung out at Camel's Back park with my friend Kris. He put up a couple of slack lines and both showed me up and got me addicted. It's so difficult! We also met Lola, who is the happiest dog I think I have ever met, as I made clear in my snapchat of said happy dog. Then we got Mexican food, walked around another park, and stared up at the clouds for a very long time.

I finally wrote a resume, too! I had been very afraid to in the past, so I'm grateful that I was able to get started on it finally. We'll see how that goes!

I also have gone to coffee with a few friends recently. I met up with my new friend Veronica and we had wonderful conversations about life. I met with my friend Rachel today, and we also had great conversations about life, and laughed at her baby's cute faces! She is incredibly adorable, and lucky to have such a great momma. I've taken myself out for coffee a few times now, and have gotten back into reading, finally! I started "Between the World and Me", and while it's a difficult emotional read, it is incredibly important. I'm very glad to be reading it.

Wow okay, that was a lot. It's been a busy week! Thank you for reading, and I look forward to writing more now, as my adventures seem to be more frequent with the coming of Spring and my newfound determination to remind myself of my freedom. Happy first-day-of-Spring to you, and I hope the sun and rain bring more adventures for you, as well! ^_^ <3

Adventure #57: Thanks, Thoreau

So much has happened since I last posted about an adventure... I went to an amazing concert (thank you to my wonderful boyfriend for accompanying me <3), was given a camera (thank you to my wonderful Aunt <3), toured the Anniversary Inn just for fun, wrote poetry every day, packed my things to move into a new place next weekend, and more...

I usually hate to just list what I've been up to, but I had lost the will to describe these events in any kind of detail... I've been focusing on finding my voice in poetry, so I wonder if I needed to just let go of my preferred prose for a while in order to find another piece of my voice.

I do feel like I've accomplished this, to some extent. I've written some form of poetry every day for the last month, and I've really learned so much. It's exciting to be pursuing this finally.

Past inconsistencies explained, this brings me to today.

Today was my first day in quite some time that I've had almost entirely to myself. I took the opportunity to meet with a friend and help them begin to parse Shakespeare's sonnets for a project. I hadn't studied his sonnets before, so I'm glad that I got the chance to help some, and I plan to study them more on my own time as well. Then I got myself lunch, and spent a few quiet hours in the library. I came home and took a much needed nap, too! Later in the evening, I went to a lecture on Henry David Thoreau, and was inspired to return to my blogging.

I'm not entirely sure how it happened, but by something in Thoreau's story of learning the histories of his fellow neighbors at Walden Pond, surveying the pond, gardening, writing, and maintaining his philosophies in spite of scrutiny, I felt reminded of the significance of my own small stories. While I believe I can bring more meaning to them through poetry, the simple and honest retelling of my experiences feels somewhat pure... I don't need to bring any more meaning to my stories in this context, as they matter simply because they are real.

Now I desperately need a copy of Walden, as well.

Following the lecture, it was night time, and I wandered a bit, bought myself a small coffee that turned medium, as they were out of small cups, and wandered some more. It turns out that the ILC has four floors. I'd never been higher than the second, and had never thought to before. I looked out at the campus from each floor as I went, then would cross to the other staircase, intending to descend, and realizing that I hadn't noticed another ascending flight, I would take those stairs up, look out the windows, cross the floor, and find a new set of stairs previously unnoticed, as I had been so focused on just exploring whichever floor I knew to be next. On the fourth floor, the view was so beautiful... And there was an odd, small set of stairs leading up to an alcove and a grey door. I hope the door leads to the roof, but it was definitely locked. I did try to open it.

Then I walked home in the most perfect weather I can imagine.

Adventure #55: College Campesino - Kermit the Frog Erotica

It's going to be difficult to do this one justice. Last night, my friend Derek read us some excerpts from 50 Shades of Grey, in which Anastasia was represented by a very "valley girl meets new jersey girl" voice, a.k.a. "more aggressive valley girl voice", or "New Jersey girl that went to the valley", so describes Derek. Then the supposedly suave and sexy Christian Grey was voiced by Derek's spot on Kermit the Frog impression.

I don't suppose it's easy to imagine, but if you can grasp the idea of Kermit the Frog seducing a young woman with an "aggressive valley girl voice", who also may have some serious daddy issues, then you're halfway there. 

Then imagine that woman talking about 'her inner goddess' dancing the dance of seven veils, something about itty bitty elephants, and borrowing a toothbrush like the dirty girl she is. Aaaaand then Kermit somehow has to play off that, and there's mention of a chocolate starfish.

Okay that was kind of painful to write... I'm sorry to anyone who enjoys 50 Shades of Grey, too! I don't mean to bash it in general because I haven't read it. Just the ridiculousness with which it was relayed to me last night left my abs incredibly sore from laughter. Honestly, it was one of the best things ever. I hope each and every one of you is lucky enough to someday hear Kermit's voice pleading you to "Put the chicken in the fridge."

Adventure #54: College Campesino - Toast Post!

Hi! I'm kind of in college now! I haven't posted in a while because the transition was pretty strange, and I haven't had much time to myself for the last couple of weeks. But here I am! And I have stories!

The first is about toast.

In the dorm where I'm living at the moment, we do not have a toaster. So I had the grand opportunity to educate my roommates about the wonders of alternatively toasted breads.

First, the pan fried bread: We also do not have a microwave yet. I softened butter in the oven so as to make it more amenable to being spread, and that was almost disastrous for sure. But most of the butter was salvaged, bread was much too slowly toasted in a pan, and fun was had by all. Actually I kept accidentally slamming the oven door shut because the spring on it is very effective, and that was terrifying.

But toast! I did it! Kolby was brave and had a bite. He agreed the pan-fried bread/ toast/ whatever Derek said it should be called is better than the average toast.

Second, the oven toast: This is my favorite kind of toast, and my second favorite comfort food. My momma taught me to make toast like this, and I would eat at least 4 pieces of it in one sitting whenever we would make it together. For this particular bit of toastiness, I butter one side of the bread, sprinkle a good amount of cinnamon and sugar on top of the butter, and place the bread with sugar side up in the oven, and set it to broil. Then the sugar and cinnamon caramelize on top, the butter sinks down in the bread a little and softens it, and then the sugar and cinnamon create like a little barrier, so the bread steams underneath and gets so fluffy and soft. It's the best!

This time I made pieces for both Kolby and I, and he said it was great toast :D

Success!

Adventure #53: The Women's March

Yesterday, I attended the Women's March in Boise. The women from my class attended, my family sent good thoughts and lots of encouragement my way, and I was able to go with a couple of my favorite people! In the picture, they are my friend Aidan and his two brothers (their very kind father took the picture), and my friend Kolby! It was an amazing feeling to be personally supported by some of the men in my life, including my own father who was so excited for me and wanted to hear all about the march. It was also a great feeling to know that these men are standing up for all other women in their lives and across the globe, through such a simple act of perfect unity. 

The media coverage of the marches was so uplifting, too! My favorite piece is this article from Slate which captures the strength, optimism, and determination that every one of us shared in. An estimated 2.9 million people marched yesterday in support of women and in opposition to injustice, with a powerful voice. I am truly grateful to everyone who participated. I stood by you, and you stood by me that day... It was an honor, and I choose to stand with you always.

Adventure #52: Snow Day!

I finally made it out in this record-breaking snowfall! To be perfectly honest, during the entire time, I was somewhat concerned that I might get stuck. The snow was easily up to my knees! And! I measured one of the icicles on our roof at more than 5 feet! We're almost caged in by now. 

Even though I couldn't stay out there long because my hands became painfully cold quite quickly, it was such a beautiful day and I'm so glad that I got to take some pictures and be in the cold. I feel so grateful to have grown up in a place where I could take sunsets, snow, and a hearty bird population for granted. These past couple of years have been such an amazing lesson in appreciating all kinds of beauty that the world has to offer, whether it be human or plant or weather pattern. I am truly humbled. 

Adventure #48: A Spoil Yourself Day

Today was a day. A day of spoils and riches and bubbles. The best day of them all.

My family and I played Clue! I winned and it was fun! It's not a great game for me to employ my hilarious-fake-smack-talk strategy, but we still had a good time!

Then we watched Dead Poets Society together, too. I really love that movie... I recognize the difficulties in the story, in that it is too distant a narrative at times, and somewhat uninvolved in terms of producing the expected effects on the audience, but I still love it. I love that Robin Williams character isn't ever so familiar to us, and that the stories of the different students disrupt the flow of the overall narrative, and that the message in the end is simply upheld. For me, it's a movie that asked me to think about something, and to feel something foreign. I wasn't drug along for the ride, and I'm tending to like that better. Movies and novels that beg the question are my favorite. Others seem to tell you what to ask, then leave you distraught with planted questions pruned back too far, stunted by a final sharp and eerie lilt that is "THE END".

I would much rather be whispered to, and entreated to find meaning in my own life than to be shown exactly where some meaning lies and how it is mine for the grasping.

Wow ok guess it did get me thinking! After the movie, I had the house to myself for a few hours! I played music very loudly and danced in the kitchen. I made a waffle and ate it with ice cream and butter on top :D Then I took a bubble bath that was glorious. And I watched How I Met Your Mother with Bitte until everyone got home :)

I came up with a new technique for my poetry today, too! I'm quite excited about that!

All in all, it was a wonderful day of indulging my sweet tooth, my thoughts, and my mild and temporary case of hedonism.

Adventure #47: Christmas Gifts!

Yesterday, I got to put together Christmas Gifts for my friends and my family! I was such a fun day of music and wrapping paper. My step mom got me a little worried that I'd given too many gifts to one of my friends, but two of them I'd gotten before Christmas and hadn't had a chance to give them to him... So hopefully he doesn't feel like it's too much, and knows that I just give gifts cause I like to :) As for gifts for my family, I sent my little brother and sister books and little stuffed animals that are so cute! I made a typewriter print for my other mom, and found a way to overlay a drawing of mine! I'm really happy with how it turned out :)

Today I'm making a gift for a gift exchange in my women's class, and I think it will turn out great, too ^.^ I might post pictures. I just realized I probably don't post pictures often enough because it's a huge hassle with my phone... I'll try to be better about that.

In other news, I'd forgotten how comfy my unicorn kigurumi is! I don't plan on forgetting that again!

In other other news, registering for classes at BSU has been a pain, but I think I've almost got it figured out! I have to wait for a couple of professors to send me permission numbers for a couple of my courses, and then I'm all signed up! I managed to schedule everything, too, so that I'm done by noon every day. I'm super excited about that.

So yes. Thanks for Christmas, friends and family, unicorns, and good school advisers!

Adventure #46: Day of Solitude

I got to spend today all by myself at home! I've just been at home by myself all day, reading by the fireplace. My favorite story that I read was called Manawee, and the analysis of it was so cool! The story holds so many parallels to my life, and it gave me a new way to appreciate my best friend and all that he is to me. It was a great day <3

Then I also listened to dramatic music while I made grilled cheese for dinner. Then I made another grilled cheese at 1am and ate it while I watched How I Met Your Mother. Grilled cheese is the best. 

Adventure #45: Boise State Bound!

I got my acceptance letter! It came yesterday in the mail while I was hanging out at BSU. I was visiting to check out the house with the three girls I could live with, and I decided I really would like to live with them! They seem like really amazing and kind people. The house is really old and adorable, too. I'll have my own room, I will need to invest in lamps, and they have cats ^.^ I'm so excited to be living with three women who's company I genuinely enjoy and in a house where I really could feel at home.

I won't be able to move in until February, so that means I will be living at home and couch crashing for the month of January most likely, but I'm actually totally okay with that xD It'll be so worth it.

Also! I convinced them that we need a kotatsu!!! They were totally on board, and that's when I figured this was meant to be.

Other miscellaneous adventures of late: I introduced my friend Kolby to the Flying M, and he thought it was pretty great. Also I'm making cookies right now because I needed them. And I'd forgotten how much I love making and finding gifts for people! I wish I had more money with which to give gifts, but I'm digging into my savings a bit to make it happen this year. I love it. I've done some writing lately, too! It was amazing! It had been too long. I'm reading again, too! I read 1984, and then had another dry spell... I don't know what was going on, but I'm glad it's over.

So yays for new friends, kotatsu's, coffee, Christmas, and books.

Adventure #44: A Walk in Winter

I walked...

Not to escape

But rather to grant myself

the crystal air

untouched snow

and slowing river

Companions to my restless thoughts. 

Adventure #43: Acquaintances and Succulents

On Friday, I finally got to visit my friends at BSU! We got Dutch, played with a kitten named Charlie, traipsed around Winco, and made a blanket fort! My friend Kolby and I stayed up super late talking on Friday night, too. It was really great because it's been too long since I've had a friend around who I could talk to like that... I needed to be reminded of how important it is for me to communicate with other people on such a significant level. Then the next night, I stayed up and just hung out (which means fell asleep on the floor) while Kolby and his best friend Derek played League. That was fun for me, too, cause I kept waking up laughing at their jokes xD Then we slept in the blanket fort until about 4 in the afternoon. I wish I had pictures of it! It was so cute all lit up with Christmas lights ^.^

Prince Charlie crouches behind my shoe for protection

From when it first snowed this winter!

I also was able to talk on the phone with one of my favorite humans ever, and she and I might be able to see each other when she makes it home for the holidays!

As for the succulents part of this post title, I got to buy some new glassware to celebrate me finding a place to live! Until this morning, it was practically a done deal, but a new option just fell into my lap. So I'm considering that and working on meeting with the three other girls I might be able to live with! They seem like such amazing people, and I could live in a house with a lower rent than the apartment I was planning on. So we'll see! But either way, there will be plants!

Future Homes for Plants

Whatever happens, I'm scared, excited, and grateful. It was so wonderful to see my oldest friends, and to get to spend time with brand new ones. I'm looking forward to living on my own, growing some plants, and making friends with more new people.

Adventure #42: Apartment Hunting

For the first time ever, I will be looking for a place to live on my own! It's pretty scary, I must admit. My two best options that I can afford are both an option for a lease takeover, and I don't know all of what that means... And I don't have a job yet. The vehicle that we have for me to drive isn't running yet, so I haven't had a chance to get into Boise to pick up and drop off applications. But! It will all work out somehow, I'm sure. 

So tomorrow, I will be checking out an apartment that's only a half a mile from BSU! And it's in my price range! Craziness. Hopefully I will hear back from my other two options soon, and I'll check those out once I do. 

Aaaaagh this is so exciting! :D

They finally are able to process my application for school now, too. This whole process has been a huge test of my faith and optimism... I have had to catch myself several times now talking myself into worries and fears. It has not been easy, but I'm so glad that I'm finally doing this. I'm so ready, and I don't really care if it's scary cause it's gonna get done. So there. 

In other good news, my step mom and I had a really good day together. We were able to talk for quite a while about possible living situations for me, the divine feminine archetype, and a bunch of other fascinating things. It was really nice... She also told me about a moment recently where she and I had been arguing, and just all of a sudden she didn't see me as just her daughter anymore... She saw me as the strong and powerful woman that I'm becoming. That meant a lot to me that she can see that in me, and that she would be willing to tell me so plainly that she really does... I am grateful. 

And to the best goober ever: I miss you so much. Thank you for being you <3

Adventure #40: Legal Vehicle Operator

I can drive now! I passed my test yesterday morning! The only things that I missed were that I forgot to be sure he could see me glancing left and right at an intersection, and I was so nervous that I couldn't remember all of the steps it takes to park the car and get out... But oh well.

So once we can get our Durango running, I can actually use this newfound ability of mine xD I'm gonna start my job hunt in Boise once I can drive out there cause I want to start work as soon as I can to start saving for while I'm in school, figuring out how much I can work, and be trained and everything. I'm also going to finally get to see my friends at BSU! It's been difficult to get over there to see anybody, and I'm so excited that I can now :)

I'm thinking I will change my major at BSU, too. I had been thinking that I would start off studying psychology because it's really interesting and I thought I might be able to use a degree in that to help people... I've been getting closer to understanding how it is that I actually can help people, though, and analyzing their behaviours isn't the way. It's fascinating, but it won't be productive in the long run. So I am going to try to be extra brave and pursue degrees that will help me to inspire people to care and feel and appreciate more in life... The goal is still a little fuzzy in my head, but I know it will change and become clearer as I continue to pursue what I love and use it to fulfill my purpose.

Hmm... Also we ate ice cream last night to celebrate. It was good.

Adventure #39: Finally Kind of an Adult

Adulting! Yes, Google, that is most definitely a real word because I said so ok.

I made phone calls today. I called BSU about my application status and deadline. (I missed the November 15th deadline for all of my admissions materials because they sent me a letter saying what else they needed, and I didn't come home until last Wednesday for Thanksgiving... And whoever put the letter in my room didn't think to tell me that I got a letter from the university I will be attending in the spring. But whatever because admissions lady said it won't change anything for me since I'm an in-state applicant. Yay!) Unnecessary information.

I called to schedule my driving skills test for tomorrow morning, too! Wish me luck! I passed the written test today, and I have no idea why I was ever worried about it... Thanks IB for making me a fantastic test taker.

I called my high school to please have them mail another copy of my transcripts to BSU. Yay again!

And my step mom and I got into another argument. All I wanted to do was call my favorite goober and be consoled, but I walked over to my Gramma's house instead because she loves me, too. We took a nap, watched an interview with Mikhail B. Khodorkovsky of the Open Russia Foundation on the news, ate mac salad, and chopped up apples for applesauce. It was a good day. My Gramma is also the one who took me to my test today, and I'm so grateful for her. <3

I started reading Emma, yesterday and it is very enjoyable. It has been way too long since I've read a book, and I'm so happy to be doing it again... God I've missed books... This is for a scholarship that I'll be applying for in May, too, so it's for fun and for monies. I'm excited to be writing analytically again, too!

Also I went for a walk on Saturday. It was so gorgeous... The air was perfectly crisp, the light was soft and blue, and the clouds were impeccably wispy.

Anywho, that's pretty much it for the last couple of days... Wish me luck on tests and applications and all, if you can spare a few good thoughts :) Thank you, and I hope you have a wonderful rest of your evening <3

Adventure #37: Thanksgiving 2016

It's Thanksgiving! I'm actually having a not good day, and I need to write... I'm just feeling so many things. Everything is starting to change again and it's hard to feel like I don't have to give in to the chaos...

I need different people in my life. I need more people who are solid. More people like my dad, my gramma, and my counselor... I've learned that I can be myself no matter what is going on around me, but people who don't make chaos and don't have expectations for others make that so much easier... It makes me cry to think that we do that to each other. That we push other people away from their truest selves so that we can feel the smallest bit better about our own lives. I'm tired... I'm tired of people trying to do that to me, because even though I know I'm strong enough to fight it, it's nothing short of exhausting...

So on this Thanksgiving, I am grateful, and exhausted. I'm so thankful for two of my best friends that have been there for me the past few days as I've had to deal with something incredibly confusing and painful. I'm thankful that I have my childhood home to come back to... Sometimes I think the actual house offers me more surety than the people in it, but it still means a lot to me to be home... I'm grateful that I got to see my best friend yesterday. It had been way to long... I'm grateful for the newest women in my life who are an incredible support system. I'm grateful for everyone who has helped to provide for me these last several months of my life. I'm grateful for so many things...

Everyday, I find something new to appreciate about this beautiful world and all its people.

And I'm exhausted. I'm tired of seeing all the tragic news about Standing Rock. I'm tired of uneducated consumerism, I'm tired of the suffering in the world, and I woke up today thinking that there might be rest for us today... But there isn't. There is chaos, there is confusion, and there is pain.

But let's be grateful anyway... Please, today of all days, we can be grateful.

Adventure #36: Foods of Late

Hey! Still alive. Been busy, gotten good at making excuses for not blogging. Recently rediscovered (again) my motivations for doing this. So, here I am!

So much has been changing in my life lately as I'm entering a new phase of things. I'm super excited about it, and in general the difference will be that I'm finally ready to start the work I've been preparing for in these past several months. But, more on that idea and those events later.

Tonight, I want to just talk about my food adventures of late! In the past few weeks, I have been exposed to many new foods. Food is one of the hobbies of the family that I'm living with, so it's been a staple of this transition. Without further ado, this non-glorious list of foods and restaurants I have newly experienced.

Places:
Taco John's
Del Taco
a Chinese food place where I never checked the name
Sherri's
Main Street Burger
Black Bear Diner
The Coffee Cup Cafe
Fiesta Guadalajara

Other Foods:
Jackfruit (smells like mangos and Kraft cheese)
Buffalo tripe (at Standing rock)
Fresh fry bread
Ben and Jerry's (like 3 flavors and I can't remember any of their names)
Corned beef hash

Yep so there's that. I don't know, I've enjoyed the experience, but I think I more just enjoy sharing a meal with people. That's been the best part of trying these new foods and restaurants. It's good for me to broaden my tastes, and I'm grateful I've been granted the opportunity, but I'm even more grateful to have gotten to share those experiences with other people.

More tomorrow. I hope you have a great rest of your night ^.^

Adventure #35: Oh Right That Blog Thing

HAHAHA i am not very good at this sometimes.

No excuses, I don't know what happened. I just disappeared for a few days, and I am certainly not ruling out aliens as a potential culprit. Is that stereotyping...?

Anyway. I am leaving for Standing Rock tomorrow!
And I was supposed to start my novel yesterday! Damn aliens.

Will update you on Standing Rock!
Will start my novel today! There's still time!

Sold t-shirts for Standing Rock today and yesterday!

Here's the design!
Yay! About 45 t-shirts sold already and I had to tell people to stop asking me for more cause I had to send the order to Kepa so he could start making the shirts. So that was sad and difficult because I didn't want to let people down... But now I have to ask for the money from people which is even more difficult... I'm so surprised that so many people wanted shirts and shared the Facebook post! I thought we might sell 25, but no! More than 25!

Yay again! So that's what I've been up to. Might start college at BSU next semester, but more on that later. 

Okie bye <3

Adventure #34: Miscellaneous Adventures

I learned what a persimmon is yesterday. They look like tomatoes, and taste like nothing if they are not ripe.

My Spotify Discover Weekly playlist is amazing this week, too. There hasn't been a single song that I've skipped or not decided to listen to again. I am very impressed.

I also had a friend send me a bunch of indie electronica that I also loved. Good stuff. Also.

I read an article last night about the difficulties in learning to model the motion of a pendulum. At midnight... I am a big nerd.

Hmmm second Etsy sale in progress! The woman wanted six pieces, but I told her since I'm leaving for Standing Rock soon and I didn't know if the longer poems would fit on the size of paper she wanted, I'm doing three of them for her for now.

I also discovered this morning (I had my suspicions) that every ten characters on the typewriter is equivalent to an inch. Whoever made these things put so much effort into the design, these are seriously the coolest little machines ever.

Christopher Latham Sholes, Frank Haven Hall, Carlos Glidden and Samuel W. Soule.
They invented the typewriter.

Adventure #33: The Funk

Fear not! I am still alive. I kind of disappeared for the last couple of days because of the aforementioned funk.

Unintentionally, I kind of set myself up for failure with this one... I haven't been outside in a couple of days, and didn't really have anything planned to do... Lately, allowing my days to be self-directed hasn't been a problem at all. But if I'd been paying attention to my own feelings as well as I'd like to be, I would have realized that now is not a good time for me to have the opportunity to watch Netflix all day. I'm going to be vague with this one, but I'm letting go of a lot... Processing an incredible amount of sadness, really. So I do wish I had made plans to keep myself a little bit busier, not to numb any feelings, but so as to avoid wallowing.

But! Today! I'm listening to music, back to blogging, made myself a good breakfast, and I'm going to finish the t-shirt design for Standing Rock. I also might have a new Etsy order! This woman wants six different pieces. I told her it will take me some extra time, and if she's willing to wait, then I would love to make them. So we'll see!

In both accounts, wish me luck! Imma beat this funk and sell some typed stuff.