Adventure #54: College Campesino - Toast Post!

Hi! I'm kind of in college now! I haven't posted in a while because the transition was pretty strange, and I haven't had much time to myself for the last couple of weeks. But here I am! And I have stories!

The first is about toast.

In the dorm where I'm living at the moment, we do not have a toaster. So I had the grand opportunity to educate my roommates about the wonders of alternatively toasted breads.

First, the pan fried bread: We also do not have a microwave yet. I softened butter in the oven so as to make it more amenable to being spread, and that was almost disastrous for sure. But most of the butter was salvaged, bread was much too slowly toasted in a pan, and fun was had by all. Actually I kept accidentally slamming the oven door shut because the spring on it is very effective, and that was terrifying.

But toast! I did it! Kolby was brave and had a bite. He agreed the pan-fried bread/ toast/ whatever Derek said it should be called is better than the average toast.

Second, the oven toast: This is my favorite kind of toast, and my second favorite comfort food. My momma taught me to make toast like this, and I would eat at least 4 pieces of it in one sitting whenever we would make it together. For this particular bit of toastiness, I butter one side of the bread, sprinkle a good amount of cinnamon and sugar on top of the butter, and place the bread with sugar side up in the oven, and set it to broil. Then the sugar and cinnamon caramelize on top, the butter sinks down in the bread a little and softens it, and then the sugar and cinnamon create like a little barrier, so the bread steams underneath and gets so fluffy and soft. It's the best!

This time I made pieces for both Kolby and I, and he said it was great toast :D

Success!

Adventure #42: Apartment Hunting

For the first time ever, I will be looking for a place to live on my own! It's pretty scary, I must admit. My two best options that I can afford are both an option for a lease takeover, and I don't know all of what that means... And I don't have a job yet. The vehicle that we have for me to drive isn't running yet, so I haven't had a chance to get into Boise to pick up and drop off applications. But! It will all work out somehow, I'm sure. 

So tomorrow, I will be checking out an apartment that's only a half a mile from BSU! And it's in my price range! Craziness. Hopefully I will hear back from my other two options soon, and I'll check those out once I do. 

Aaaaagh this is so exciting! :D

They finally are able to process my application for school now, too. This whole process has been a huge test of my faith and optimism... I have had to catch myself several times now talking myself into worries and fears. It has not been easy, but I'm so glad that I'm finally doing this. I'm so ready, and I don't really care if it's scary cause it's gonna get done. So there. 

In other good news, my step mom and I had a really good day together. We were able to talk for quite a while about possible living situations for me, the divine feminine archetype, and a bunch of other fascinating things. It was really nice... She also told me about a moment recently where she and I had been arguing, and just all of a sudden she didn't see me as just her daughter anymore... She saw me as the strong and powerful woman that I'm becoming. That meant a lot to me that she can see that in me, and that she would be willing to tell me so plainly that she really does... I am grateful. 

And to the best goober ever: I miss you so much. Thank you for being you <3

Adventure #40: Legal Vehicle Operator

I can drive now! I passed my test yesterday morning! The only things that I missed were that I forgot to be sure he could see me glancing left and right at an intersection, and I was so nervous that I couldn't remember all of the steps it takes to park the car and get out... But oh well.

So once we can get our Durango running, I can actually use this newfound ability of mine xD I'm gonna start my job hunt in Boise once I can drive out there cause I want to start work as soon as I can to start saving for while I'm in school, figuring out how much I can work, and be trained and everything. I'm also going to finally get to see my friends at BSU! It's been difficult to get over there to see anybody, and I'm so excited that I can now :)

I'm thinking I will change my major at BSU, too. I had been thinking that I would start off studying psychology because it's really interesting and I thought I might be able to use a degree in that to help people... I've been getting closer to understanding how it is that I actually can help people, though, and analyzing their behaviours isn't the way. It's fascinating, but it won't be productive in the long run. So I am going to try to be extra brave and pursue degrees that will help me to inspire people to care and feel and appreciate more in life... The goal is still a little fuzzy in my head, but I know it will change and become clearer as I continue to pursue what I love and use it to fulfill my purpose.

Hmm... Also we ate ice cream last night to celebrate. It was good.

Adventure #39: Finally Kind of an Adult

Adulting! Yes, Google, that is most definitely a real word because I said so ok.

I made phone calls today. I called BSU about my application status and deadline. (I missed the November 15th deadline for all of my admissions materials because they sent me a letter saying what else they needed, and I didn't come home until last Wednesday for Thanksgiving... And whoever put the letter in my room didn't think to tell me that I got a letter from the university I will be attending in the spring. But whatever because admissions lady said it won't change anything for me since I'm an in-state applicant. Yay!) Unnecessary information.

I called to schedule my driving skills test for tomorrow morning, too! Wish me luck! I passed the written test today, and I have no idea why I was ever worried about it... Thanks IB for making me a fantastic test taker.

I called my high school to please have them mail another copy of my transcripts to BSU. Yay again!

And my step mom and I got into another argument. All I wanted to do was call my favorite goober and be consoled, but I walked over to my Gramma's house instead because she loves me, too. We took a nap, watched an interview with Mikhail B. Khodorkovsky of the Open Russia Foundation on the news, ate mac salad, and chopped up apples for applesauce. It was a good day. My Gramma is also the one who took me to my test today, and I'm so grateful for her. <3

I started reading Emma, yesterday and it is very enjoyable. It has been way too long since I've read a book, and I'm so happy to be doing it again... God I've missed books... This is for a scholarship that I'll be applying for in May, too, so it's for fun and for monies. I'm excited to be writing analytically again, too!

Also I went for a walk on Saturday. It was so gorgeous... The air was perfectly crisp, the light was soft and blue, and the clouds were impeccably wispy.

Anywho, that's pretty much it for the last couple of days... Wish me luck on tests and applications and all, if you can spare a few good thoughts :) Thank you, and I hope you have a wonderful rest of your evening <3

Water is Life: Standing Rock

I've been home from Standing Rock for a few days now, and took some much needed time to catch up on sleep and let all of the events settle before I wanted to attempt to write about them. So here I am, slightly more rested, ready to share this part of my story.

Verbally, I've relayed these events several times in questionable detail, so I'd like to approach this telling differently. I've had a chance to reflect on all that I understand I've learned from this experience, and I'd like to focus on those aspects of  the story for my own purposes of contemplation and for purposes of efficiency.

One thing that I learned while I was at Standing Rock is how generosity and determination can go an incredibly long way in supporting life. There were so many needs at the Oceti Sakowin camp, but because of donations, communication, and good intentions, everyone is being cared for adequately. I was consistently amazed by the ability of people to organize and meet everyone's needs. It was astonishing to me because, there were few constructs that I'm accustomed to; there was no delegation, no ruling body (other than certain activities where the approval of the elders is strongly recommended), and few rules. Everyone was there to be a part of this incredible movement, and each had their contribution. With all of these people in one place, united by one cause and one philosophy, without hardly any structures of our over-arching society, incredible things are being achieved. In my thoughts, one of the greatest achievements is a productive and peaceful coexistence.

Another lesson for me was about how I contribute to the world. I struggled on the first two days feeling like I wasn't doing enough. I felt guilty for taking a nap, even though I really needed to because my exhaustion was bringing me to tears... I felt like I couldn't carry enough supplies at once, couldn't cut potatoes quickly enough, couldn't handle the cold with ease... It wasn't until a man struck up a conversation with me and wanted to say he had seen me helping, and that he was grateful to me for doing so. That conversation made me cry a little bit, too, because I needed to hear that someone saw what I was trying to do... Then, once I knew that someone had seen me, I didn't feel like I needed to measure how helpful I was or how hard I was working by what someone else thought. How could I? This man probably didn't see me take a nap. He didn't know how little sleep I'd gotten the night before. He couldn't have known how hard I was working or how hard I wasn't. Only I could know if I was doing everything that I could to help, while still taking care of myself. This really helped me to more completely understand that my contribution to the world can't be measured. It's up to me to do what I know I need to, and no else can say if it is or isn't enough. I know it is.

I'm losing my focus now, but I will continue in another post soon. As always, thank you for being a part of my story, and I hope you have a wonderful day <3

Adventure #35: Oh Right That Blog Thing

HAHAHA i am not very good at this sometimes.

No excuses, I don't know what happened. I just disappeared for a few days, and I am certainly not ruling out aliens as a potential culprit. Is that stereotyping...?

Anyway. I am leaving for Standing Rock tomorrow!
And I was supposed to start my novel yesterday! Damn aliens.

Will update you on Standing Rock!
Will start my novel today! There's still time!

Sold t-shirts for Standing Rock today and yesterday!

Here's the design!
Yay! About 45 t-shirts sold already and I had to tell people to stop asking me for more cause I had to send the order to Kepa so he could start making the shirts. So that was sad and difficult because I didn't want to let people down... But now I have to ask for the money from people which is even more difficult... I'm so surprised that so many people wanted shirts and shared the Facebook post! I thought we might sell 25, but no! More than 25!

Yay again! So that's what I've been up to. Might start college at BSU next semester, but more on that later. 

Okie bye <3

Adventure #30: More Officially Moved

As of last night, I am now back in Meridian. I have like nothing with me right now except my notebooks, computer, and some clothes, but I'm here! The transition has been harder than I thought it would be... But I think I just have so many things on my mind at the moment. Just processing a lot of emotions and projects all at once and it's making me a little tired. Things feel right, though. I feel settled inside, and it's a good feeling.

Sooo I've listened to a ton of music lately because I need it. I've been refining my Spotify playlists for a few months now and I'm finally like really happy with them! Maybe I'll share some of those. I really love sharing music with people and I try to do it often. Sharing music with people is such a personal form of communication. In my mind, I'm sharing a little experience with someone that just says, "This made me feel something." So anyone who shares music with me is awesome because then they gave me a chance to feel something, and maybe I'll even have a similar experience with the music to theirs. That's an awesome thought, to me...

I've been drawing a bit. Still working on my staff because this design is taking forever and it makes my hands hurt, so I've been working on it in 4 hour spurts once I get over the hurts. Last night I started a drawing that incorporates the same pattern, and I like it so far... So here's that, and now you have an idea what my staff looks like on the bottom, too!

Breakthrough on my novel today! I am closer to finding a story to fit my ideas. I made some progress on my exploration of religion today, too, which I am very excited about.

Also. I have decided. When I am a mother, I will make sure my children have blankets and sheets specifically for forts, capes, playing outside, and any other joyful activity they come up with where blankets are a necessity. That is all.

In other news, Bitte climbed up next to me in this chair and cuddled with me for like an hour. I love her so much.

The End. Not really.

Adventure #24: To Tacoma, Through Vancouver

We're on a trip! My Gramma asked me a few days ago if I needed to get out of the house as badly as she did, and I said yes. So we're driving to Vancouver, Tacoma, and Albany to visit a few family members.

On our first day, we drove to Vancouver from home and got there around 6pm Pacific Time. I got to drive for about 4 hours straight, including some in Portland traffic, but my Gramma didn't know where to tell me to go, so that was really scary a couple of times... I didn't do anything crazy, but she did have me take the next exit off the freeway so that she could drive and I could navigate by way of our lord and savior, Google Maps. I exited toward the airport, so there were several more turns and exits to take before I found a Wendy's parking lot! And then we had dinner because yes.

We made it to her friend's house in Vancouver, and I have never been so at ease around two old ladies before. This woman's house was so full of things, meaning plates, decorations, tea cups, cloths, lights, and books! In the past, when I've witnessed such a full house, the woman living inside it clings to her possessions to stave off loneliness and boredom. There is nothing wrong with such things, but the nature of it has meant I haven't felt comfortable in those kinds of places. However, this woman's house felt cozy. And like all of her possessions were there to be put to use. She collects plates and china because she is a professional tea-teacher! Well, actually a "Certified Tea Etiquette Consultant" according to her business card. She was so sweet and made us the best tea ever. I'm so glad I got to meet her!

We also had stopped at the Columbia River Gorge because it's so gorgeous and windy. The last time I had traveled this route, too, I had several snapchats of the river and I put little boat and cloud and sun stickers on them ^.^

So! Thanks for the read! And here are way too many selfies of me, one picture of the gorge, one of the view over Tacoma from our hotel, and one of my adventure buddy, Murdoch <3

Murdoch is a tiny homie

So Koi

Das me

Contrast

Windy Business

Columbia River Gorge

Tacoma, WA

Adventure #20: Maybe Moved In, Learning to Move On

Hey! I've moved! I'm now living in Meridian, ID with some close family friends. It's not as big of a leap that I'd hoped for, but it's a step in the right direction, I believe. It's kind of a trial period for now, where they're letting me stay here for a little while until I'm sure this will work for me, and if it does, then I might stay. And I definitely cried a lot while I was on the phone with my Dad last night... I miss him so much already...

This time in my life has been so huge in terms of transition. One of my sets of parents got a divorce this summer, all of my friends started college, I graduated, I moved out (maybe), I started a blog, started an Etsy store, I'm writing a novel, my relationship with my best friend and boyfriend of many years has been changing in many ways, and I'm still working on going to Germany soon. It's been amazing to have this blog, too, and to reflect and appreciate all that's been going on in my life. I don't know that I would have appreciated it all quite so completely if I hadn't been sharing it along the way. So I'm very glad that I have had this opportunity, and I hope that it's been valuable to some of you in any way, too!

All of these transitions mean this has been one of the most powerful times in my life, and also the most difficult. I don't know that I have ever felt so much uncertainty so often. I'm learning so much about myself, and while there have been a lot of tears, there also is a great new sense of awareness forming. I'm excited, terrified, sad, confused, and content all at once, almost all the time, lately. But in the deepest part of me, no matter how much turmoil I feel around me, I am becoming still and quiet, for the first time.

To all of you and any of you who read this, thank you for being a part of my journey. <3

Adventure #19: Announcing the Understory

So I made plans to move out today, and then they kind of got put off... But the reasons are secret and personal so I can't talk about it, but basically I'm upset with some people and really grateful for how others are helping me handle this.

So there's that super vague update for ya.

Also planning a road trip with my Gramma, so stay tuned.


The main meat of this post, now: I announced my novel today! It is called Understory. I'm super excited to keep working on it, and as soon as I have any kind of sample, it will be in a post, and available on my Nanowrimo profile.

The topics I'm currently exploring with intent to include them in the novel are: perspective, familiarity, religion, nature, what-ifs, progress, story, and the shadow nature. As I think and write about each of these more, they slowly come together, bit by bit. I have no idea how all of these concepts will connect through plot or setting, but they are connected through many other means, and I hope to discover their proper literary representation soon. Also, if you have any significant thoughts that come to you when you think of the word Understory (or when you look it up), let me know? I'd love to know what kinds of images and ideas the phrase evokes.

Thanks again! And to my significant otter and goober who hopefully will read this, you're always on my mind. And you can do it! You're amazing! <3

Adventure #18: A Normal Day of Little Adventures

It's today!

I started decoratin my staff today. I honestly don't remember if I mentioned it before, but I made a staff. Now I'm decorating it. Honestly I think it looks super freaking cool, too. Will post pictures tomorrow(?) when I'm finished. It's an adventure because I've never decorated or even made a staff before, and I've never drawn anything like this, especially not on a staff. So, an art adventure! We'll see how it goes :)

I also wrote a lot today. Some really cool ideas and thoughts that I think I will start to share on here as they continue to form. It will help me to explain them to someone other than myself, as it'll mean I will have to solidify my thoughts in order to convey them with any semblance of clarity. So look forward to THAT!

Another everyday adventure today: I took a break from my phone. I checked it a few times, but didn't keep it on me all day, and actually stopped worrying about it after a few mental slaps on the wrist. I only used 10% of my battery life, so I'm pretty proud of that xD And it felt good! It was hard because I'm still letting go of something, but I feel much better about it after a day of practicing being okay.

In other news, I promised myself today that I would quit dismissing something that I just said out of worry that nobody cared. I cared, so I said it, and that's ok!

As always, thanks for the read, and I hope you had a day of little adventures, as well <3

Adventure #17: The Phoenix

Damn! Already missed a day. Oh well. It's the thought that counts, yeah?

So today was a really amazing day. I refer to the Phoenix in the title of this post because I think there are a lot of lessons for me to learn right now in terms of what beginnings and endings really are, and what they can be for me.

Today is a perfect example. I spoke with my dad about moving out and we gained both closure and and agreement about how to move forward. I went to a wedding of a good friend of mine, and promises and commitments, meant for enhancing and ensconcing the love between them, were made. I spent 5 hours making barefoot sandals for the bride, which was definitely new... And all of the other beginnings and endings, newness and oldness, I couldn't describe it to you, yet... But I saw it, felt it, everywhere today.

My boyfriend and I broke up today, too. That one has been more difficult already than I thought it would be... I'm choosing to support him in his choice to be alone for however long it takes for him to find himself. And I'm struggling because even though I had broken up with him for the same thing before, I still had this fantasy that somehow we could find our individuality, together. I'm learning very quickly that it's so important for me to leave him be... And I understand that this can be a powerful opportunity for me, as well. Maybe even if we aren't walking together, we can still walk parallel paths toward self-discovery. That is my hope, at least.

So here's to leaving the door open for new lessons and understanding. Here's to knowing when it's time to be reborn from the ashes of what has been. And here's to accepting the end that must occur for the sake of the rebirth that is to be fueled by newfound potential.

Adventure #16: A Weeks Worth of Adventures

Okay! Commitment time. I haven't been posting every day... I promised myself that I would, and now it's time to make good on my word. I'm committing again to post every day because not every post needs to be fantastic and have pictures, I just need to be furthering my perspective and embracing living my everyday life passionately from wherever I am.

So to kick off this renewed pledge, a summary of recent and tiny adventures!

Let's see. I made muffins today. My step-mom buys boxed muffins mixes and then since the mixes are in the house and they aren't used very often, sometimes I get on a roll and use them all up! So the mix was for almond poppyseed muffins, but my dad and I prefer the lemon ones. So I mixed in lemon zest and lemon juice, and I think they're way better that way xD

I tried a new lotion. Fascinating. One of my friends had given me some samples, and so I went with it. One of them was not a face lotion, and my skin is currently regressing to its stressed out 9th grader state. But! Then the other lotion was definitely a face lotion. It was Juice Beauty, the business started byyyyy what's her name omg I practiced this Gwyneth Paltrow! There we go. It was awesome, too. It smelled so frappin good and made my skin feel all soft and nice. I was surprised, too! After just a few minutes of letting it settle, there was no sheen or anything but it still felt great. So when I become rich, I'll definitely invest in the stuff.

What else what else. Ah! Sleepover with my boyfriend. He and I have been together for the larger part of the last 7 years, and this was the first time we'd gotten to do this. It definitely was an adventure. I am a very warm sleeper, twin bed, and he's 6ft tall, but it actually went quite smoothly (maybe my late night sneezing fit was the exception). It was as cute and cuddly and practical as I could have imagined ^.^

I also have added some new items to my Etsy store! Including a custom listing option since now I have my fancy paper. I'm a mild nerd about paper now, and I like that about myself, so yeah. Here's the link again to my Etsy store cause I have to shamelessly self-advertise: SansPoetry

I'm going to write a novel! I'm doing Nanowrimo this year (the link if you haven't heard of it before), and am currently working on idea planning and stuffs. I'm honestly super excited, and I will most likely post often on the blog about this as it will be an every day thing in November. I'll link to my profile on the website soon, too, so that you can follow me along that way and we can collaborate if you're doing it, too :)

I went to my first women's circle this past weekend! It was amazing, and I really learned so much. The class is called "I am Woman" and it's about understanding and discovering the true feminine nature and how it applies to ourselves. Cool stuff. I might post more in detail about it later, but I'm undecided right now because the nature of the content can be very personal, and I'd like to go all out or not at all instead of trying to censor such important things.

Last update: I might be moving out soon! My friend in Monterey that I was going to stay with is likely moving back home very soon, so that didn't work out, but oh well. A new opportunity has arisen due to the kindness of wonderful people, and it's in the works. Will update.

Okay, cool! I've been up to more things than I thought... Thanks for the read, and peace to you all! <3

Adventure #15: Meditation for Intuition

I have to be honest, this is probably the hardest thing that I've ever done...

I'm a very analytical person. It used to be that I refused to feel certain emotions if I didn't understand why they had arisen. If I was ever unable to make sense of my feelings, I chose not to feel them. I often had trouble ever letting my mind take a break because my self confidence was so wrapped up in my intelligence. I'm a math person, an arguer (arguments don't need to be fights, look it up), and a thinker.

So I always used to joke that I don't actually have intuition. Turns out, that's not quite true... My counselor explained to me the value of intuition and how in can work in cooperation with the analytical mind. I'd never seen a point to getting touch with my intuition because it was rare that my thinking through something didn't lead me anywhere, especially once I'd become more secure in myself and didn't feel stressed all the time.

But, finally ran into something that I couldn't solve or understand from my current perspective, and now I am working on choosing what to do from this thing inside me that knows what's right for me. It's all an exercise in trust and letting go of control and being patient, all things I'd long avoided practicing by approaching everything analytically first.

So I've been meditating every day for 5 days now, usually twice a day. I sit outside on a rug and eat my yogurt and cereal to just kind of sit and get used to being there... I do some yoga for a few minutes to help relax and focus. And then I meditate, and usually it lasts at least an hour which feels good. Yesterday it was almost an hour and a half where I was actually in meditation and it felt really great.

As for the things I've understood so far, there are just a few small pieces of wisdom that have come to my attention and I don't know how they all fit together, yet, but there's been something new everyday and it all feels like progress.

So I've learned that it is kind to surround yourself with others who are kind. Honestly, it seems so simple, but I'd never thought of it. And it makes so much sense! To surround yourself with people who are kind is to understand that you are worthy of kindness, and to understand that acts of kindness feed more acts of kindness. So this applies well to me right now because I'm in the process of defining for myself what it means for me to be kind.

The second awareness that I remember (I should have been writing these down...) was about rejection. It was just some clarity about the forms that rejection can take and what it means for me.

And the third awareness that I can recall was about a fear that I've been struggling with. I'm afraid to do what is right for me out of fear of hurting other people. Through metaphor, I understood it as this: The tree does not stop growing for fear of casting a shadow. That is to say, I don't need to be afraid anymore of hurting others through my own growth. There is light everywhere, and anyone in growth can choose not to stand in my shadow.

Thank you, as always, to anyone who reads these posts. I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy writing them. <3

Adventure#14: Fancy Paper

As you may have gleaned from the title of this post: fancy paper.

My paper samples came today! I have some really nice ones on which to start printing quotes and poems and such. This is the next step for me in terms of my Etsy store, so I'm very excited by linen textures at the moment.

Soon I'll post pictures of the new items that I make, and maybe I'll even tell you what type of paper I settle on ;)

Again, any requests for quotes, just lemme know and I'd be happy to make something, just cause.

Adventure #12: SansPoetry

SansPoetry is my store! I opened my Etsy store today when my debit card came. (Yes, I know. I paid with cash for everything in high school, I don't know how I made it through.)

So I am officially open for business! I have a few bookmarks listed and am working on listing more. Several are made, I just have to input a lot of information about every item so it takes a while.

I'm also working on getting custom orders up and running, just waiting on some paper samples so that I can use the same kind for the custom orders.

For now, if anybody has any quotes they'd really like to see (either to purchase or just cause someone needs to hear them), share them with me in the comments! :)

To anyone who is interested, here is the link to my store: SansPoetry
And photos of my Royal 10 ca 1924 typewriter!

Sew beautiful ^.^

Adventure #11: The Road Not Taken

I've been wanting to write this post for a while now, but I don't think the time was right until today.

Two of my best friends began college this week, and I've really struggled with a lot of aspects of that all of a sudden...

I was jealous of one of my best friends because she is doing everything that I had planned for myself years ago... Now I'm choosing a different path than what I had planned, and I let my insecurities about my choice get in the way of me being happy for what she is choosing for her life. Luckily, I have some amazing sounding boards in my life who called me on my issues. I wish I had been in a place to be happy for her when she most deserved it...

Then my other best friend and I have been struggling on different levels and at different times with my choosing a different path. College was always something that we had planned to do together, and now I'm lamenting that opportunity lost. This stuff got in my way of being happy for this friend when we both really wanted me to be... My dad put it perfectly, and said that even when we know we have to give something up, often we still need to mourn the loss. I thought, then, that maybe mourning that loss and grieving what was given up is actually how it can be let go... I suppose that process is unfinished thus far as, though I am now able to feel happy for my friends in every way, I am still so sad that we won't get to share this experience with each other, like I always thought we would...

So here I want to be open to mourning this road not taken. I'm still honestly incredibly sad that I'm not going to college with my two best friends. But I am also now in a place to feel honestly happy about my decision to move to Monterey and go to school in Germany. And I can understand that the two emotions can coexist and aren't mutually exclusive.

I just want to say now how I appreciate my friends and all that we've shared. I do hope that there will be many more experiences between us in the future. Thank you to my best friends for helping me in so many ways to reach this point in my life. I hope I have ever done the same for you.

Now we are all on to different, even separate, things. But please know that you will always be in my heart, on my mind, and you hold a piece of my soul. I love you both so much. <3

Adventure #10: The Silent City of Rocks

 Today I went on an adventure with my best friend! We've had many over the years, but this is one of our last official adventures for awhile as he just started college this week. It's a bittersweet beginning, but I'm so proud of him and so happy that we got to have a wonderful day together. Here are photos from our adventure in The City of Rocks!

Them Rocks Tho

Dat Rock Doh

That is a Nice Boulder.

Stairway to More Rocks

The Adventures of David and Cora

Happy Hikers

Adventure #9: Aspiring Freelancer

Today, I finally submitted my first application to write for a website as a freelancer. The website is HelloGiggles and it's a wonderful community of female writers who report on health, feminism, Disney, and their life experiences. It's a website that I've followed for several years, and their pieces are always pertinent, funny, and uplifting.

I'll be so grateful if they want to use my piece, and even more grateful if they hire me as a regular writer! I'll post another update when I hear back.

Wish me luck! ^.^

Adventure #2: A Plea for Vulnerability

A friend of mine recently posted on his blog a statement on kindness and the way he chooses to live his life. It was really pertinent and heartfelt, and it really inspired me to say something on the topic, as well. (His blog is very witty and entertaining, and I absolutely suggest checking it out. He discusses and analyzes current NFL news as well as shares his many wonderful musings on life, the universe, and everything.)

So what I'd like to talk about it vulnerability and how it relates to kindness. I know a lot of you have probably heard all about what it means to be vulnerable and why it's good for you, but a side that we rarely talk about is how it's good for other people when we're vulnerable, too.

Think about it this way: If you remain closed off because of fear, worry, pessimism, whatever your ail, then nobody else gets to experience you... By cutting other people out of your life, keeping things surface level, or being afraid of intimacy, you're taking away a chance for you and someone else to share something. It's not just that you'll be unhappy if you don't let people in. It's that you're refusing to share yourself with the world. You're being selfish. You keep your story and your wisdom and whatever you are supposed to do while you're placed on this earth all to yourself. Fear of vulnerability will keep you from fulfilling your purpose in life, whatever it may be.

My favorite perspective on this topic is from C.S. Lewis. (I'll probably write a "To Inspire" post about it as well because it really means so much to me.) He says:

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.” - C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

Until some recent thought, I hadn't really understood why closing yourself off to people is a selfish act, but now I understand. You have a gift to share with the world. You have love to give, wisdom to share, kindness to express, and sympathy to feel.

So I ask you. Please find it within yourself to take risks, be vulnerable, and love freely. I am a fierce optimist, and with determination, we all can be. There is no limit to strength of will, so no matter how you have been hurt, let down, or confused, please choose to live outside of the fear for your sake and everyone else's. This world is lucky to have you <3